Obligations ...

One thing I dislike about is having "well meaning" visitors that wants to comes to my place to visit. They will setup a time with my mother and then my mother will just announce.

So when I get frustrated, they say "Oh, it's not nice to turn them down since they come with well meaning, and they say they hadn't seen you in a long time". My grandaunt, ok, never mind, because she's such an old lady, so I won't mind giving in to her.

On the other hand, this other person, after the huge fuss I kicked up the last time, my mother again gave me the above reasons. I said no and I refused to entertain this "family friend". She hadn't seen me in years, so what difference does it make anyway? My mother called for back up and got someone to call me, and this time, basically I yelled down the phone. I don't mind if they want to come another time, or call first to check with me. I dislike it when they arrange it, I said no, and they try to change my mind by saying not nice. My retort? I never agreed for that person to visit in the first place. Besides, how on earth am I suppose to rest if they say come at 2pm, and often reach at 3pm, and if I had to pump milk, they won't be happy since I'm not outside to entertain them. It's a no-win situation, and I might as well just put a stop to it since they just add to my stress and BP. It's like giving an inch, and they want a foot. I have limited my family visits to just weekends and my mother's to alternate days - I cannot cope with the constant well-meaning "intrusions" since I need to start dealing with motherhood and grapple it well before my confinement lady returns home and I return to work.

Perhaps my temper is getting worse, but it doesn't help if they cannot respect my rights as a mother and my home as my place. Call me stubborn too, if you want, but I'm tired and all I want is a little peace in my own home.